Christian bullshit

From the former War on Faith website:

Christian Bullshit
All religions are founded on the fear of the many
and the cleverness of the few.
Stendhal

Purpose.  This page is dedicated to debunking the favorite myths of Xian fundamentalists and some others concerning Xianity and atheism.  Too much misinformation is floating around and this is just a list of some to clarify facts as they actually are.   You might call it "Heathen FAQ".

Defining Terms.
"Xian" is a common name free thinkers use for "Christian."   The "X" in "Xian" replaces "Christ" in "Christian" just as "Xmas" does for "Christmas".  Using this method my name would be "Xopher".

"Fundy" or "Fundie" is a religious fundamentalist.

"Theist" one who believes in a god of creation.

"Sheep" is a slang word for fundamentalists and anyone else who follows along blindly with something they have been told without bothering to investigate or even question it.    It seemingly never occurs to Xian sheep that they are Xians simply because they were brought up in Xian households in a predominantly Xian country and that if they had been born to devout Muslims in Iran they would probably think Xianity was so much horse shit.

"God"  is the god of the Christian religion.  Yahweh is another name for him.

"god" is any of the other gods which Christians claim are "false".

"There are no atheists in foxholes."   This one is acutely annoying for me because I was in Uncle Sam's Misguided Children (USMC) in the infantry and now I'm a cop.   I've had my share of close calls and "Level 10 Pucker Factor" incidents and calling on a god just never came to mind.   My partner was in The Corps in Vietnam in the infantry and according to him, he never saw any gods or called on any.  He managed to live through the ordeal and come away with a Bronze Star and two Enemy Marksmanship medals (Purple Hearts).  Not only was he an atheist in a foxhole, but he was a bona fide hero to boot. I know seven other heathens at the dept. I work at and they've never "called His name" either.  Isn't it funny that every damn Fundy will spout this shit off but will never bother to consider if it is even slightly based in fact. I have also discussed this with countless heathens online and I have yet to meet one who went through rough times or a near death experience and called on any god.

Defining Atheism.  The 1998 Webster's Collegiate Dictionary defines atheist as "One who denies the existence of God".  This is complete horse shit.    Webster was a bible thumper who's fondest work was his version of the bible, which bombed horribly.   The Merriam Webster's Dictionary of today sells to a mostly theist market and defines words as they are commonly used.  The reason this incorrect definition is present in Webster's is because it has been so widely spread by the flock fleecers.  If an incorrect definition is widely used, it is still incorrect.
Technical dictionaries define how words should be used instead of how they commonly are misused.   A-the-ism,  Root words:   A-without;   The-god;  Ism-belief.  The meaning from the root words is "Without belief in god"  It does not mean any certain god such as Yahweh, which the Xians call "God" and it does not require denial, simply a lack of belief.   Proving gods do not exist is completely impossible, but then so is proving that pink unicorns don't exist.  It's endlessly entertaining that theists think they should tell atheists whether or not they are atheists.

The Virgin Birth.    The virgin birth is a lie.   It's not just a mistake or misinformation, but a bold faced lie.  The ancient Hebrew texts were intentionally mistranslated by those employed by King James to write his version of the bible.  The actual verse is "behold, a young woman is with child".   There were separate words in the Hebrew texts for "young woman" and "virgin" and this passage specifically stated "young woman".   Newer versions of the Xian Bible have corrected this.  Most fundies of course clutch their King James for dear life and consider all other translations as false.  Why?   Because they have done extensive research and have found the King James version to be more accurate?  No.   Probably because their preacher says so and that old english sounds so cool with all the "thou shalt takest thine ass hither" things in there.   Sheep.

Christmas.   Jesus' birthday according to the bible was not December 25.  In fact it was not in December at all.    The birth date of Jesus can be roughly estimated by scriptures in the Christian Bible referring to the birth of John The Baptist.  John's father was a temple priest and the bible said that John's father had just returned from his assigned duty week at the temple when John was born.  According to the schedules of the temple priests John's father would have returned in June.   Scriptures also state that Mary became pregnant when John's mother was three months pregnant.  This would place Jesus' birthday in September or October.   The Winter Solstice is the true reason for the season. Do you think Xians will attempt to discourage celebration of Xmas in December because it is actually a pagan event ?   Hell no.   Why would they let something so silly as facts or their own bible get in their way?

Why do atheists talk so much about God if they don't believe in Him?   Atheists in the USA talk about the Xian god and Xianity so much because of the profound impact Xianity has on them.   Xianity is in our face everywhere we go.  Everywhere Xians are attempting barbaric takeovers  in an attempt to strip us of our rights.  Everywhere in the USA there are Xians trying to destroy the wall between church and state.  Xians trying to make belief in god a requirement and the rules of the bible our laws.  Xians forget that the last time the church and state were one is referred to as The Dark Ages.  It is a major concern. Xians trying to ban the teaching of evolution in schools.  Xians trying to force religion on our children.  Xians burning books.  Xians showing up at gay funerals with signs that read "God hates fags".  Xians shooting abortion doctors and blowing up clinics.   Xians (Pat Robertson for one) grouping us morally with child molesters, murderers, and thieves.  Xians like Former President George Bush saying we're not even citizens.  Xians everywhere are in an all out attack to destroy us and they have the audacity to think we would not be concerned?  Atheists do not go knocking on doors telling Xians that they are stupid and they're going to hell and how sorry we feel for them.  Atheists don't tell Xians what to think and what to believe in.  The Xian fundies claim they are being assaulted by us, yet they are the ones who do all the assaulting.

Darwin recanted on his deathbed.      This is completely fabricated and has no foundation in truth whatsoever, yet this is a favorite lie of the Xian fundamentalists .   A woman named "Lady Hope"  spoke to a church group shortly after the death of Charles Darwin.  She claimed that she was at Darwin's bedside on the day of his death.  She also claimed that Darwin recanted on evolution and accepted Jesus on his deathbed.   Her claims are not only unsupported, but are directly opposed by Darwin's daughter, Henrietta.    Henrietta stated "I was present at his deathbed," she wrote in the Christian for February 23, 1922. "Lady Hope was not present during his last illness, or any illness. I believe he never even saw her, but in any case she had no influence over him in any department of thought or belief. He never recanted any of his scientific views, either then or earlier. We think the story of his conversion was fabricated in the U.S.A. . . . The whole story has no foundation whatever."'

Slavery.   The Xian Bible endorses slavery.   It even sets up rules on selling slaves of different ethnic backgrounds and beating slaves.    Exodus 21:20 Leviticus 25:44 Ephesians 6:5 Leviticus 25:45-46

Evolution has been proven false (is only a theory).    Evolution is a fact.   The Theory of Evolution is only a theory.  That humans evolved from lesser life forms is considered a fact by all reputable scientists.  The exact steps of the evolutionary process are the only things debated.  Xians have spread lies about this excessively.  "Christian Science" is an oxymoron.  Even the Vatican recognizes evolution as fact.  The fundies think the Catholics are going to hell anyway.

I don't believe we evolved from monkeys.  The theory(ies) of evolution does not state that humans evolved from monkeys.   It states that monkeys and humans evolved from a shared forefather.  Xian fundamentalists seem to love spreading this little bit of misinformation while sitting on their tailbones.  Where did that little ole tailbone come from, anyhow?  Probably from the same place that the fundies think all these "fake fossils" came from.

Atheists have no morals.  All I have to say is "check out your prisons".   You will find that they are chock full of Xians.  Of course it is not surprising that there is no evidence of any truth in this at all.  I haven't met any atheists who kill abortion doctors, or who are overt or covert racists, or who attack the gays at every turn, or who are silly enough to consider Disney evil.  And just who are Christians to assign the definitions of morality?  These are people who assign immorality to nudity and sex to the extent that if a girl is not a virgin until she is married, she is to be taken to the door of her father's house and stoned to death with stones (Deuteronomy 22:20).  A Christian Fundy wouldn't know morality if it hit him in the face.

This is a country founded on Christianity (Separation of church and state was not intended by the founding fathers).     Horse shit.  Here are a ton of quotes from our founding fathers.  Separation of church and state was considered to be paramount, and many of our founding fathers were deists, not Xians.

Satanists.   There is seemingly no end to the misconceptions Xians have and openly promote about Satanists.  LaVey Satanists are hedonistic, but they DO NOT believe in Satan.   I like to call Satanists "Charismatic Atheists".  They seem to have chosen Satan as their figurehead just to shock the hell out of the Xians.  I say "Ave, baby".

Sympathy for the devil.   I feel sorry for the devil.  He really got a bum rap.   God, who is all powerful and all knowing created the Devil.   Surely then God had to have known exactly what the Devil would do before He ever made him.   In the Old Testament the Devil proceeds to revolt and is cast out of Heaven.  In the new testament the Devil is pulled out of the pit and allowed to run loose for a while thinking he's won.  Then the Devil has his ass beaten by God and is then cast back into the pit to be tormented for eternity.   What a sick bastard this God is for creating the Devil purely for this purpose just so he could kick his ass and torture him for being exactly what God created him to be. God's an asshole.

You watch.   I'll get mail from someone stating that I just admitted to believing in the Devil, so therefore I must believe in God.  I'll go ahead and post this here so I don't have to write it in a hundred e-mails.   I do not believe in God or the Devil, I simply refer to him as I would to any reported god from any book of myths.   I felt genuinely sorry for Prometheus when Zeus chained him to that mountain, but I don't believe that shit is real, either.  That is where Xians get wedding rings from, by the way.   Interesting little bit of info.   The devout little Xians wear wedding rings which come from the story of Prometheus and symbolize bondage.

Atheism is a religion (atheism requires faith).   This is more demented horse-shit spread by the Fundy preachers.  It is probably brought about mostly by an inaccurate definition of atheism.   Religion is a system of beliefs based on faith.   Atheism is not a belief, but a lack of belief and therefore faith is not possible, and atheism being a religion is not possible.   Calling atheism a religion is like calling baldness a hair color.

Every adult atheist I've ever met came to the decision of not believing in gods due to logical consideration of the facts and evidence available.  Faith is a belief in something with little or no basis in logic, science, or factual information while atheism, even by the Webster's definition, is a logical conclusion based on substantial evidence verses a vacuum of substantial evidence.

Madalyn Murry O'Hair founded atheism  Ms. O'Hair is certainly the favorite whipping post of the Fundy Horde.  I have never met a fellow atheist who considered O'Hair to be the cutting edge of atheistic thought, nor have I found any who particularly liked or respected O'Hair any more than your average atheist for her positions, or thoughts, on atheism, but, personally, I fucking loved her for her titanium backbone and her innate ability to cuss a blue streak.  One thing you can not deny is that O'Hair had the bouncing brass balls to take on the govt. for the least liked cause imaginable and she did not couch her message in scholarly, boring, politically correct speech.  She cussed like a fucking sailor, but whether you liked it or not, you knew exactly where she stood.

O'Hair did not found atheism.  She founded The American Atheists, which is a group of politically active atheists.    Atheism did not have a founder, it has simply always been.  Every child is naturally born an atheist because this infection called "faith" has to be brainwashed into the spawn, or it would not exist.  It is only logical that atheism was around before religion, since we have no evidence that religion was created by anyone but mankind.
"We have heard talk enough. We have listened to all the drowsy, idealess, vapid sermons that we wish to hear. We have read your Bible and the works of your best minds. We have heard your prayers, your solemn groans and your reverential amens. All these amount to less than nothing. We want one fact. We beg at the doors of your churches for just one little fact. We pass our hats along your pews and under your pulpits and implore you for just one fact. We know all about your mouldy wonders and your stale miracles. We want a 'this year's fact'. We ask only one. Give us one fact for charity. Your miracles are too ancient. The witnesses have been dead for nearly two thousand years. Their reputation for 'truth and veracity' in the neighborhood where they resided is wholly unknown to us. Give us a new miracle, and substantiate it by witnesses who still have the cheerful habit of living this world. Do not send us to Jericho to hear the winding horns, nor put us in the fire with Shadrach, Meshech and Abednego. Do not compel us to navigate the sea with Captain Jonah, nor dine with Mr. Ezekiel. There is no sort of use in sending us foxhunting with Samson. We have positively lost all interest in that little speech so eloquently delivered by Balaam's inspired donkey. It is worse than useless to show us fishes with money in their mouths, and call our attention to vast multitudes stuffing themselves with five crackers and two sardines. We demand a new miracle, and we demand it now. Let the church furnish at least one, or forever hold her peace."
..........Robert Ingersoll  "The Gods" 1872